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My type..

Wed, 14 Dec 2011 05:19:31 -0800

We were having this conversation at work today about ‘types’ and I do have to say that my type would actually fit one of my friends perfectly. But I’m too shy to say anything to them because they don’t normally live in the area anymore (unless they are visiting their parents that is).

My type has to do with how sweet and caring a person is on the inside and if they can make me laugh. I really would like someone musically inclined. For physical attributes I prefer them with curly hair and that they are taller than me but that’s not always the case.

In a way I just described my friend which is kinda creepy….

Who Is Travis Clark?: Money and Time

Wed, 07 Dec 2011 03:35:34 -0800

Who Is Travis Clark?: Money and Time:

whoistravisclark:

Imagine there is a bank account that credits your account each morning with $86,400. It carries over no balance from day to day. Every evening the bank deletes whatever part of the balance you failed to use during the day. What would you do? Draw out every cent, of course? Each of us has such a…

Thank you for choosing sex over friendship. Now I know where we really stand

Sat, 12 Nov 2011 18:45:21 -0800

When you have a friend who knows that their boyfriend/sexual partner (I don’t know what to call him since he’s getting married to a different woman) is lying about you, at work and is telling you that they are going to do everything they can to get you fired what would you do?

I expected her to at least explain it to the guy outright that I was not saying those things. Instead she listened to him lie again saying that I chewed him out at work when in truth it was the other way around. I’ve been feeling since that day like I’m going to throw up from the stress that he is causing me.

Right now instead of going out with me like she had said she was going to, she instead needed to comfort him in his worked up state. If that guy ever shows up at my house again I’m going to do what she was supposed to do and explain to him that I did not do anything that he’s telling everyone I did. I don’t even know anything about it. So either he should stop being angry or he should back down and leave me alone. He’s creating a hostile work environment for me and if he really wants I’ll go to HR and explain that to them. It all depends on what my friend will back. Sex or friendship.

Sometimes I wonder about my experiences

Sat, 05 Nov 2011 02:48:48 -0700

I know that I have not had many experiences in the relationship department. When I have had the experience it just wasn’t as far as many other people have had. I go into this mainly because it seems like all the people that I know now adays have either lived alone with someone they are into or they are already living with this person right now.

Now I’m not complaining about my living arrangements; but it just seems that I have not had as much in the long relationship part. I know it makes it seem like I’m lonely or something (which I am not) but I assure whoever is reading this that I am 100% fine with who I am, single, and living it up.

There are a few people out there that seem to find my disposition on everything just a little to unsettling, but I just find that most of the people that are out there just seem to not like me because I take my jobs seriously. I know that I try to have a social life outside of school and everything but for one thing I just can’t seem to keep up with the amount of hours that I put into both my jobs and my social life at the same time. So right now I’m just trying to make everything perfect in their own way.

This would totally go into my friend Crystal’s...

Fri, 16 Sep 2011 14:16:00 -0700

This would totally go into my friend Crystal’s room!

decaydance:

What’s better than having a sweet Cobra Starship poster? Having a sweet SIGNED Cobra Starship poster!

For our new weekly contest, we’re giving away 3 autographed Cobra Starship posters! Just reblog this post to be automatically entered to win! Winners will be announced next Wednesday.

No you are not on this list....

Sat, 10 Sep 2011 02:56:05 -0700

I don’t know how I’m feeling right now, I’m currently liking the fact that I’m single yet all around me my friends are either hooking up with people and finding their one true person or at least getting together with someone and letting it last when they should have ended it a long time ago just so they could feel happy for a little bit longer. I find myself in this position mainly because I don’t want to date the few people that have brought up the idea of dating to me. Most of them being old friends that I haven’t seen in a long time that I didn’t know for the whole time I was hanging out with them ect. that they had a thing for me.

That being said I found out in a rather personal note that I just can’t deal with them because I know that they like me and their little ticks which were originally funny games are more prominent flirting gestures. Especially since they let it out into the open they are even more presumptuous with their flirting gestures and who I hang out with which it is none of their business. Some of these people even have come by and broken up a get together, just because I have given another person a hug after a very long time of not seeing them.

But then again there are those few that I would want to date if they would just get the balls to ask me out or if they just simply weren’t with people. I big problem right now is that I’ve dated to many guys that are loving and caring but they never seem to have anything else going for them. They are awesome boyfriends, but they don’t have that much experience in just plain hanging out or having fun.

I made a list that seems to explain everything that I want from a guy, but as my friend says I have to be willing to give up on finding the ‘perfect’ guy and just find one that matches most of those on my list. Seeing as most of the things on my list are actually personality I can easily compromise the physical attributes. But still that only leaves a few people out there. Those few that I already know are the people that would never ask me out or they are as I said simply with someone already.

Oh well, being alone right now is fine with me. I’ve gotten used to it and I think, it’s gotten used to me.

streeter: benjoseph: collegehumor: I’m Such a Nerd (with...

Wed, 15 Jun 2011 14:41:41 -0700

streeter:

benjoseph:

collegehumor:

I’m Such a Nerd (with Katrina Bowden)

If you want to be her lover, you have to LARP with her friends.

I wrote this sketch starring Pat and the lovely Katrina Bowden of 30 Rock fame. I have huge crushes on both of them.

I had nothing to do with this sketch. But I certainly enjoy it!

What the Hell! Martha Jones is certainly my favorite out of the most recent Doctor Who Companions. Rose is the worst, Donna’s annoying, Amy Pond’s with Matt Smith Egh… I could go on with reasonings…

I feel really stupid right now

Fri, 18 Mar 2011 02:52:05 -0700

Who the heck tells you that they love you and then turn around and say they aren’t in it for long term? I feel used. I want to cry. I have cried, and I’m at work. Why out of all the things he had to say did he have to go aand tell me that he has thought of breaking up with me just because it would be easier? I mean, he has gone and told me how he didn’t tell me about something because he thought it would effect how I felt in the long run. But now he goes and says that he never wanted a long term? I mean what does that mean? Has someone been talking to him that he would rather be with? I know people think the grass is always greener, but I feel really depressed right now. Will I ever find someone? Or will I always end up with relationships like this where the one person that does accept me and my epilepsy happens to decide not to want me in the long haul. I feel useless and I just wish I could cry myself to sleep tonight and not deal with anyone.

Giddy...

Wed, 09 Feb 2011 02:44:54 -0800

Now I do know the feeling is mutual… I’m very happy and content. I’m also very glad that he is too… ^^

Maybe I should just sleep my days away

Sun, 30 Jan 2011 10:45:13 -0800

I’ve been getting so depressed lately that all I want to do is sleep. So far no one’s called me back about hanging out when I really need to get out of here and be around friends. I’ve just gotten so tired and so lonely this past weekend that it feels like all I have been doing lately has been sleeping.

But most of the reason’s I know of that people aren’t calling me is because everyone’s been catching some bug; I almost feel like I’m ‘Typhoid Mary’ or something.

I just wish right now that I didn’t have to be alone.

I feel as if death has made a new friend...

Sun, 30 Jan 2011 00:02:00 -0800

I don’t know if this is a little bit too personal but I don’t really care; About a month ago my cat disappeared, we soon found out that he had crawled up under my parents house and died. Buddy was my cat, and to have him do that upset me, he was probably the only guy to ever give me unconditional love. Then a week later my parents decided to put down a dog that was about 13 years old. Kryten was an amazing dog, very undemanding, the first pedigree that my parents owned and my mother even got to watch him be born.

This week my Auntie Ching dies on Sunday. I didn’t really know her as well as my mother but she was really the rock that held that side of the family together. Then Friday morning my dog Camille dies. Now Camille was my dog out of the five at my parent’s. She slept with me some nights, she cuddled with me when I was down. She was just a pretty awesome dog that knew how to please herself.

I just think right now I need a very big hug…

Sometimes I just wish...

Sun, 23 Jan 2011 01:04:25 -0800

Loneliness is something that I know that I suffer from on a day to day basis usually I have someone to call and talk to when I am feeling all cold and alone; but I know that there are those days that even then I can’t call anyone. I feel as if I’ve lost many people that used to be dear to me and have gained nothing to show for it.

I have read the Chinese zodiac on many different columns and all say that I’m supposed to have a good year because this is the year of the rabbit, my year. But all I can see coming out of all this is just doom and gloom. I just wish at times that I hadn’t isolated myself so much. Life would have been just soo much easier if I hadn’t felt alienated by all my peers at such a young age. Damn genetics.

I wonder if I’ll ever find anyone that I could talk to on a regular basis that isn’t afraid of me or intimidated by my attitude. I don’t want all this gloom anymore, I want something happy to pick up in my life.

Summer Calls

Sunlight gleams out from the sky

Nature seems to not know why

Warm sensations touching our skin

Vitamin D to which we give in

Birds sing a chorus of fine tuned chirps

‘Summer is coming’ they call from a birch

Spring clouds burnt away, finally it’s here

Summer calls from somewhere near.

Dreams of You

Scenes of you

Scenes I keep

Closed in my mind

But not in my heart

Scenes of dreams

Drift to my sleep

Of you and me

Finally I weep

To see these scenes

and know not the truth

They’re then dreams of lies

Kept in my mind.

This is Hilarious! OMG!

Fri, 21 Jan 2011 22:45:21 -0800

This is Hilarious! OMG!

Today went by very slow...

Fri, 21 Jan 2011 03:04:27 -0800

I’m going to miss Cheyenne… Today went by so slow I felt like it was midnight when it was really 6pm. I was not having a good night. =(

I feel I f-ed up...

Mon, 17 Jan 2011 12:12:48 -0800

With me I always fee this way after going out with someone. I am always judging myself harshly but, this one I really want to convince myself otherwise. Maybe I’m just a hopeless case that tries too hard, but I kinda like it that way. I know I may be too nice, or I may just have said something that kinda set him off… but I hope not…

Reel Big Fish - A Little Doubt Goes a Long Way Yeah Who’s...

Tue, 11 Jan 2011 03:55:00 -0800

Reel Big Fish - A Little Doubt Goes a Long Way

Yeah Who’s been reading this?

Motion City Soundtrack - Even if It Kills Me I’m going to...

Mon, 10 Jan 2011 08:32:45 -0800

Motion City Soundtrack - Even if It Kills Me

I’m going to give up; Friends are always worth more than lovers. Unless he, or someone else comes along asking me out or whatnot I don’t think I’ll be dating anytime soon. I’d rather just enjoy their company as a friend than have to deal with them if anything ever happened… =(

Armor for Sleep - We’ll Own the World This song has been...

Wed, 05 Jan 2011 03:58:29 -0800

Armor for Sleep - We’ll Own the World

This song has been stuck in my head for the past couple of days; I don’t know what all is going through my head right now, but I know right now that I am ‘Twitterpated’ (I am quoting Crystal and Thumper on that one).

I hope everyone had a nice Christmas and New year. It will soon be the year of the Rabbit! Yay! it’s my year yet again!

Reading a romance novel

Sat, 25 Dec 2010 03:37:19 -0800

Reading a romance novel is really making me realize how alone I really feel. I mean I have friends that are around for me, but they seem to almost always have someone. But little ol’ me has to always be the one that listens; I mean I don’t mind being alone, it’s just on the holidays it sticks out more because everyone’s with their family and loved ones. Me, who am I with? I’m with my parents having to muck out their bathrooms. I just wish at times like these that I had someone that I could put my head on their shoulder and relax for a movie or something.

I dunno; Maybe it’s just a dream, but it would just make me feel all warm and fuzzy inside for once…

Midtown - Direction I feel as if I am running out of time and I...

Wed, 03 Nov 2010 12:51:00 -0700

Midtown - Direction

I feel as if I am running out of time and I am running out of ideas. This song totally explains my feelings right now. Almost as if I am running around in circles with this one guy that I like. Like we will always remain in the ‘friend’ state and never anything more. Life is almost never positive for me, but for some reason I can almost always make it positive for others. Maybe I just have a negative look on life, or maybe I just see myself always being lonely, and I know it.

The only person that has ever loved me unconditionally ran away Friday. I don’t even know why or if I will ever see him again. It’s always this way around the holiday season for me, it’s like the holidays and my birthday are cursed for me to endure torment of neverending bad karma.